ripped at every edge
by adventurous-wonderland
Summary: In that moment, it is hard to say who she hates more: Hashirama or Madara. / Uzumaki Mito knows that Hashirama loves Madara. It doesn't make it any easier to bear. [Hashirama/Madara, hints of Mito/Tobirama. Mito-centric]


No one questions why the Hokage spends most nights in the Uchiha Clan Head's room. They are best friends, they founded the village together; it's only natural for them to spend time together. When Mito raises doubts, Tobirama and Touka silence her fears. _Hashirama has always been like this_ , Touka assures her. _He is devoted to peace, and Madara shares his dream. Forgive his inattentiveness_. Tobirama's eyes grow increasingly dark as Mito continues to worry. _Forgive my brother_ , he tells her. _I will speak with him, I promise_. But Tobirama's words go unheeded, and Mito spends her nights waiting for a husband who never appears.

It is hard to be gracious to Madara, even though politeness has been ingrained in Mito since infancy; she is an Uzushio shinobi through and through, and also an Uzumaki, and courtesy does not desert her, even when true kindness does. She pours Madara's tea for him, keeping her eyes averted and he back rigidly straight even as she imagines spilling the scalding oolong in his lap. She tries to ignore the way his dark eyes linger on the exposed skin of her neck and arms, but cannot suppress her disgusted shudder. She sees the way his angry eyes lighten as Hashirama approaches, shouting a greeting to the Uchiha. Her hands tighten on her teacup as Hashirama and Madara embrace. In that moment, it is hard to say who she hates more: Hashirama or Madara. _Mito,_ Hashirama calls, concern clouding his eyes. Mito smiles, setting her cup down gently. _What is it, Hashirama-kun?_ she asks, and for a moment, as Hashirama smiles and touches her shoulder, it is easy to pretend she loves him.

 _Why do you do this to yourself?_ Tobirama asks her one day. It is warm, and she has taken this opportunity to sit by the lake. It is nothing like the ocean she grew up by, but some days the homesickness is too much to bear and she will take whatever comfort she can. _I am his wife,_ she tells Tobirama. _I am his wife._ Somehow, the words fall flat. Tobirama falls silent and sits with her until nightfall. _He loves me_ , she tells him as they return to the Senju compound. She does not know if she is trying to convince Tobirama or herself, but she knows that neither of them are convinced.

Mito has been married for three years when she is forced to accept that Hashirama does not love her. She is nineteen and her heart breaks and there is no one to piece her back together. Hashirama loves Madara, and whatever Madara feels for her husband is too complex and violent and broken for Mito to understand. She is nineteen and utterly alone in a foreign land, but she is still and Uzushio shinobi, and so she does what she has always done. Mito smiles and pours tea and entertains the Uchiha and pretends that she does not know that the red marks marring Madara's skin are love bites left by her own husband. Sometimes, she thinks, dignity is all one has left.

When Mito seals the kyuubi in her, she does not expect to survive. She knows only that her husband will die if she does nothing, and even if Hashirama does not love her, Mito has no desire to see his death. When she regains consciousness, it is Tobirama who holds her, cradling her close to his chest as the forest burns around them. _Mito,_ he murmurs into her hair, _Mito, stay with me._ His voice breaks, and something in Mito's chest tightens. _I cannot live without you._ It is not a declaration of love, not in so many words, but it is enough.

* * *

brief author's note: A Mito-centric look at the founder's era. Canon-compliant but also au-ish. I honestly don't know what this is, I just like to think that Hashirama loves Madara and Mito knows, and TobiMito is one of my favorite ships just because of the potential for tragedy. Let me know what you think, I wrote this in like an hour and didn't edit it. There's a little bonus thing after this note that didn't really fit with the rest of the fic.

additional note: Mito being so young is historically accurate; we aren't given an age in canon, but I always thought she would be much younger than Hashirama and Tobirama. In this, she married Hashirama when she was 16. He would've been in his 20's or early 30's.

bonus:

Mito is twenty and in love with her brother-in-law. She knows that she is breaking every rule, every moral code that she has ever prided herself on, but Tobirama makes her _feel_. Even though Madara is two-years gone from the village, Hashirama still spends his nights away from Mito. She thinks, perhaps, that now his absence is a gift. Hashirama is a genius among shinobi; she is not so foolish as to think her affair with Tobirama has gone unnoticed. Still, the guilt eats at her newfound happiness, and fear threatens to shatter her near-perfect world when she senses life growing in her. Her fears prove unfounded when Hashirama first holds his niece – his daughter, as far as anyone in the village knows – and smiles down at her. _What did you name her?_ he asks, and for the first time, Mito's guilt fades. _Tsunade,_ Tobirama says. _Her name is Tsunade_. Hashirama stares down at her child, wonder growing in his eyes. _Tsunade_ , he repeats, and smiles.


End file.
